4 Ways to Boost Your Child’s Confidence

Confidence is an important attribute in shaping social skills and emotional intelligence. Without confidence, your child may struggle with becoming independent or standing up for themselves when they feel peer pressure. Self-confidence helps with the transition into elementary, middle, and even high school. It can give them the boost to ask the girl or boy they’ve had a crush on since Kindergarten to the dance or later in life it can help them go after their dream job. Every achievement, both big and small are stepping stones to self-confidence and you can help them get there. So how do you help your child boost their confidence? I'm sharing four ways you can help encourage this trait today.

family and parenting teens and pre teens

4 Ways to Boost Your Child’s Confidence

how to parenting techniques for teens and preteens

1. Don’t save them from everything 

Children grow by making their own mistakes. When we do everything for them or save them from every struggle or an uncomfortable situation, they aren't learning self-confidence or how to take responsibility for their mistakes. Becoming self-confident and a self-starter takes a little independence and a little bit of failure. Independence from you is their way of finding ways to build their own confidence and test the waters of growing up. It’s unrealistic to think they will thrive as adults if we constantly save them from their errors. It's natural for us to want to protect them but sometimes we can take protection a little too far and actually hinder their ability to fail and succeed on their own. The next time your child forgets their homework, let it sit on the table or in their room where they left it instead of rushing it up to school.

parenting teens and preteens

2. Let them make their own decisions 

I’m not suggesting you let your child run the show at home but there are appropriate times for letting them make their own decisions. Decision making is an important part of confidence. It provides children with the opportunity to use and trust their own judgment. Offer opportunities for them to make the decision for the family by giving them choices – just be sure the choices you offer are ones you’re really willing to follow through on {like pancakes for dinner or watching the Incredibles instead of Dumbo}.

I admit that I was wrong about parenting teenagers. Come see why.

3. Focus on the positives 

Children measure their own worth by what you think and feel. Praise and give positive feedback where it’s due. Instead of telling a child they’re wrong when they make mistakes, encourage them to try again and a small boost with words or phrases like “almost!” or“so close”. Reassure your child that they won’t always do everything perfectly. Some things take patience and continual effort. Sometimes, it’s the effort and not the result that’s important. It can be easy to look at the negative but finding ways to be optimistic and concentrating on the positive can teach resiliency when things don’t go their way or turn out the way they expected. This is not the time to placate them with compliments though as that gives a false sense of confidence.

4 Ways to Boost Your Child’s Confidence

4. Support their passions 

Everyone needs a cheering section. Your child already has you as their biggest fan but supporting their activities can keep them engaged, interested, and learning. This can mean toughing it out on the soccer field in the rain every spring or tolerating every squeak and shriek coming from her flute until it begins to sound more like Swan Lake and less like a Strangled Cat. Even if their interest isn’t your cup of tea {like starting a garage band}, supporting and respecting their interests can give them the confidence to be adventurous and try exciting things later on in life. Above all, listen to your child and be a good confidence coach. They won’t succeed at everything but if you're listening to their hopes, dreams, and fears, you’ll be there to shout “I knew you could do it!” or give them the support they need to try again if they don’t succeed.

Want to know how to support your teens as they discover their passion? I've got you covered.

Do you have any other tips you think have helped boost your child's confidence? I'd love to hear them.

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